Stuff about stuff.

A promise is a promise is a promise ...

On the docket for discussion: work, school, family, love, life, projects, miscellaneous ...


First up - WORK!

I was offered a permanent certified sub job right before Christmas at a local high school. It was good news I needed right before the holiday to really kick back and enjoy myself without feeling like I should be sending a thousand more resumes, instead. The job is basically still substituting, but going to the same school every day. This is beneficial because you get an immediate pay increase, and you also go to the same school over and over, allowing you to get to know the students and staff much better than the sporadic, one day here, another there scenario of regular substituting. Unfortunately, even thought I am technically fully employed by the high school, I have not seen consistent results with working. The downfall is that there just isn't a need for a sub every, single day. In short, I still feel like I am sitting on my hands, doing nothing, wasting time, a lot of the time.

So, I have started "the resume game" again, sending out tons and tons of resumes, hoping for a significant bite. Among those are applications and resumes to schools who needs Special Ed Teacher Assistants. I have decided that being a full-time teacher for only the next 4 months would be pretty pointless, since will (hopefully) be starting my Masters in the fall (more on that in a sec). I never thought that working with special ed would be something I could, personally, do. I think it takes a very unique, awesome kind of person to work with special needs kids. I never thought I was one of them, but the more I think about it, the more I think I would feel completely and totally rewarded at the end of the day. So, as with most things these days, we shall see.

Patience, I have finally had to learned. ;)


Second on the list - SCHOOL!

My applications have been sent, and I am awaiting letters. I applied to only three programs, and I have no clue what the results will be. I did really well on the GRE, so I'm hoping my scores will win the boards over. My verbal was great, my math was average, but my writing was apparently perfect (literally ... highest score possible). As for decisions on where to go on the chance that I get accepted to all three ... who the heck knows?! I applied for Teaching Assistantships at each of the three colleges as well, so I suppose it would come down to where I could teach at the college level, get cheap(er) tuition, and ... you know ... be happy.

I hear that letters should start coming in at the end of February, and possibly be here as late as April or May. Lots of balls up in the air right now. No sense even trying to juggle them all until they start falling.


Third - FAMILY!

I've updated quite frequently on the fam. I haven't said much about my mom, sister, dad, and Norbs, though. I'll do that now.

My mom is still rockin' it at her alterations shop. She has more work than she knows what to do with, but I kinda think she likes it that way. I am constantly proud of how successful she has become, completely on her own. She's an amazing seamstress, and she has always worked hard ... she deserves all the benefits she can reap. I suggest all of you go into see her whenever you need. She *loves* it when I send people in. Ha!

My sister is back in school!!!! Hallelujah, and pass the banana pudding! She's "optimistic" about the prospects, and I couldn't be more excited for her. I miss her and love her immeasurably. The older she gets, the more I realize that we are each other's rocks. I need her, and she needs me. It's just that simple.

My dad is still living here in Austin. I see him about every 2 weeks. We keep trying to plan on a weekly Sunday lunch or dinner (much like I had back home), but for some reason, we can't seem to get our schedules together enough to make that happen consistently. It is nice to have him in the same city, though. We all need a familial touchstone from time to time.

Norbs ... ah, Norbs ... he is still just that! He cracks me up every, single minute that I am around him. Once you get used to his "way," he's charming as all heck. It took many years for him and I to really get along, but we have been in a father/daughter pattern for many, many years now. I appreciate it tremendously, as a girl can never have too many people looking out for her.


Fourth and counting - LOVE!

Alex and I are still living together, going strong for ... well, I don't keep count ... a year and a half now. "Life" has been stressful for both of us lately, and I fear some of that just naturally leaks into any relationship. I do try to keep my respective stresses separate from each other, though. Meaning, I try not to bring them "home." He does the same. I am not quite sure I would have made it through this past year without him ... this, I know. I also know that it is impossible to perfect any love. Perfection is boring. There are always going to be little quirks, which I think might make the particular pairing more unique and irreplaceable.

I will confess that I am somewhat worrisome right now about what happens when each of our letters start rolling in for school (him, Law ... me, Masters). To some extent, the particulars of what happens in the future are out of our hands. I like to know everything about what is going on at all times, so this is difficult for me. In the meantime, all we can do is support each other as much as possible and hope for the best.


Five is fine with me - LIFE!

It's tricky, that's for sure.

This past year has been enlightening in ways I am not sure I can quite comprehend just yet. I get the feeling I have taken a lot from my experiences, I am just not able to file them away in a coherent manner right this moment. Eventually, as with most things, time will reveal clarity.

What I can ascertain is that I've grown up a lot and learned more than I ever thought possible about ... so much ... but one thing I have not mastered handling with grace is taking it day to day. I still want certainties, and that is not usually reality. I keep thinking about this conversation years and years ago that lasted until the sun came up. In those hours, when time seemed to stand still for me in that car, I actually believed there were definites. I have realized since then that nothing is definite. You can do what you do for you, but it's not just you flying the plane. Even when the skies are beautiful and there is not a cloud in sight, it's not always a guarantee that the person sitting next to you will want to go in the same direction you go. I mean this in a more broad sense than it seems, really. I am speaking of most things in life. Nothing is just up to you. Nothing. It's such a horrifying and comforting feeling all at once.

I continue to work at letting go, of letting what will be, be. Something tells me this is a lifetime mission, and I accept it with hope and faith that there really are such things as rewards, and balance, and even the completely abstract, like true love.


Six will be quick - PROJECTS!

I've recovered our kitchen table chairs and made new throw pillows lately. I want to do more. I'm going to have to let my mom show me how to knit again. I can't remember any of it, whatsoever.

I also have made it my personal mission to read an insane amount of noteworthy books BEFORE I start my Masters ... hoping that it will relieve some of the stress once I get there, and somehow prepare me for the discussions and papers and thesis deliberations. We shall see.

I'm writing, but I seem to jinx myself out of finishing every time I talk about it. So, that's all I'll say for now ... I'm writing.

I'm looking into taking some classes online about photography, PowerPoint, Photoshop, and things of that nature in the next few months. ACC offers a lot of continuing education stuff, so I really need to look more closely into that.


Seven to close with - MISCELLANEOUS!

I'm worn out from the previous six, and can't, for the life of me think of one extra thing to include.

Oh, here's one, we went and saw Defiance last night at Alamo. It was a really good movie, but so sad to me. It was set in WWII, about a group of Jewish people who were literally running for their lives. Tore me up. I still can't believe all of that ever happened. So, incredibly sad.

We also saw Gran Torino last week, and loved it! It was nothing like I thought it would be, but that actually turned out to be a good thing.

I have no exciting music discoveries to speak of ... which is weird in and of itself. I am listening to the playlist I put together, though. I'll close with the song on now, because it seems fitting in an odd way.

"Years make everything alright, you fall on me for anything you like ... and I, no, I don't mind ..." - Keane


Fin.

Ice Day, No-Drive Day!

Soooooo ... I am now heading to Lubbock tomorrow instead of today. Who would have ever thought that the days Winter finally decides to make itself known is the days surrounding travel? (About par for the course, really ...)

I'm sure I could leave today ... the question is, how safe would it be? After many extended conversations this morning with the fam, we're all convening manana. We'll still be there for the post-surgery and recovery. (I was going to let the actual doctors do the majority of the in-depth work, anyway. Ha!)

I love to ramble these days (most days, let's face it). My point was ... I'm going to write that long-ish update on what-have-you's later today. First, I am going to make myself some breakfast and have a very large cup of Dunkin Donuts coffee (because it's the best), then I will be back on here ... fingers flying.

I'm a little discouraged about not being able to head out today when the only place I want to be is with Aunt Kay and the rest of my crew ... but, you know, safety first! A good rule of thumb: when the schools in and around the route are delayed and closed, don't drive!!

I'll be back in a bit. In the meantime, if you miss me (I crack myself up), feel free to listen to the swanky playlist I added at the bottom of this page yesterday. I am! It's Mr. LaMontagne singing "I think you're crazy ... just like me ..."

It's probably true. ;)

Aunt Kay's surgery, mainly.

This trip to Dallas was good times. I always enjoy a little down time with the fam. I'm blessed enough to have an amazing group of people surrounding me, supporting me, and constantly in my corner (no matter what). This counts for more than most people realize.

The weekend consisted of hanging out and hanging in. Sunday was the baptism, and Corinne is growing like a little weed! I cannot believe how much that child has blossomed in only one month! It's wild to me. She's still adorable as can be, though ... sweet as ever.

Tomorrow, if weather permits and ice melts on the route I plan to take, I will head to Lubbock for the end of the week and weekend. Aunt Kay is having surgery on Thursday. Exactly which kind, we aren't quite sure yet. She is going in for an angiogram, then the doctors will go from there once they can physically see the extent of her blockage.

We are all crossing our fingers for angioplasty or stents, and definitely not bypass. Stents would require a 24-hour stay, and ... well ... we just won't even go into the other. The symptoms apparently started sometime at the beginning of last summer and have become persistent enough to seek specialization, so something does need to be done.

Aunt Charlotte, Melanie, and myself are all driving in tomorrow to await the outcome and offer our support. With something like this, there is no other place any of us would even consider being. She is Aunt Kay, after all! I can't even imagine.

Even though all of us are expecting only great things to come of this, surgery of this kind of always a little scary. I don't normally ask these kinds of things, but whatever each of you do ... positive thoughts, prayer, cartwheels, fireworks ... please send one Aunt Kay's way on Thursday. She's such a selfless, wonderful person, always doing something for everyone else ... she deserves all the goodness she can get right now!

I'll keep everyone updated, of course. Until then, enjoy the gloriously cold weather! :)

#1 Travel Peeve

In lieu of my travel experiences back and forth to Arlington (not Virginia) on I-35 this weekend, I feel the need to share a reflection.

All it takes is one jackass abusing the purpose of the left-hand lane to back up traffic for miles and miles.

When you really sit down and think about it (as I did for hours and hours in bumper to bumper traffic this afternoon), this basic principle can be applied to many facets of life.

Don't be that jackass!!!!!

Arlington, not Dallas

I'm going to The Big D, and do mean Dallas. Well, Arlington, really. I am meeting the fam there for Corinne's baptism. It'll only be until Sunday, but it's always nice to go on a quick road trip every once in a while.

Plus, the cedar down here is doing a real number on me. (I think it's the cedar, anyhow. Can't be completely positive that's the culprit, but I imagine it is since the counts have been "off the charts" the past few weeks.) Either way, this lump in my throat (yeah, like you're holding back some massive waves of tears, only not about to cry) has got to go away! I'm going nuts.

My intention yesterday was to post a big update about school, work, life, love, plans (of the tentative nature, of course), and so on ... but I didn't get to it. I went shopping for Corinne, instead. (I think that is grounds for a pass!)

So, I will just have to update next week when I am back in town. But I will have to do to it early in the week, as I am heading to Lubbock from either Wednesday or Thursday to either Sunday or Monday. Kay is having surgery (which we are all hoping doesn't turn out to be too, too serious), and I am going to join the ranks of the take-care team.

I know I just left somewhat of a cliffhanger for those of you who are either curious, concerned, or both, but that's all I have time for this morning. I have some major jobs to do before my departure around noon today. Must be on time to fetch Kay from the airport in Dallas!

So, until next week, I hope everyone has a delightful weekend, one that is allergy-free, lump-absent, and full of family fun! Oh wait, that's what I hope for myself. Well ... I hope the same, or something mighty similar for all of you. Take care of each other. Talk to you soon ...

Who doesn't love a cookie?

I baked cookies all day today for a fundraiser at the school where I work. Mainly chocolate chip, but I threw in some sugar and "cowboy" (with oatmeal, chocolate, nuts, and the like) for good measure.

I have been MONDO stressed out lately, but there is something about baking that relaxes the heck out of me. Yes, as corny as it sounds, the measuring and mixing and timing and yummy smells somehow help me harness my chi. I can't explain it.

Maybe it has something to do with me always having a knack for baking. Cooking, I'll admit, I have had to seriously work on to become what can legitimately be considered "good." With baking, though, I have been a winner from day one. That's a good feeling.

I am sure it is very strange for some of you probably reading this to envision me cooking almost every night, and baking for functions where the stuff will actually be sold. All I can say is ... I'm still getting used to it myself. I have had great success with a lot of my recipes lately. Maybe I'll share some of them on here one day.

In the meantime, I am going to watch some Man V. Food on The Travel Channel before bed. (Oh, how I love The Travel Channel these days!) Andrew Zimmern (sp?) is my favorite! He eats some crazy-nasty stuff, but it's interesting to me to see about cultures across the globe by way of food. And the Man V. Food guy ... I realize he gets paid to torture himself via food, but ... WOW, that guy takes on some insane eating challenges. Yowzers!

(In closing, I'm going to write a more "update-ish" type post tomorrow. Lots going on, most of which I still don't know much about. The rest, however, I will fill everyone else in on.)

Giselle?!

So ... there is something I feel I must address/question. Let me preface by asserting that I am not, in any way, bothered by it. I'm just supremely curious.

Over the last year or so, I have had MANY people approach me, telling me I look like Amy Adams. (The actress in the photo above and others below.) I didn't put much weight on the issue until my drive home for Christmas, when a little girl (about 5 or 6, I'd guess) literally dragged her mother over to me, pointing and yelling, "Mommy, it's Giselle! MOMMMMMMMMY! Giselle, look, IT'S HER!" (Giselle is Amy's character in the movie Enchanted, for those who don't keep up with Disney.)



Now, I can deal with some adults coming up to me at random, saying it at Target, the grocery store, work, and so on ... but when a child actually BELIEVES that I am the character played by the girl in a movie ... made me wonder.

The first person to tell me I look like her was actually Alex. Him and his old roommate were watching Saturday Night Live with her hosting before I even moved to Austin (I think that's when it was), and he called me immediately to tell me to turn on the TV. I was, of course, away from any place where television viewing was possible at the time, but ... still ... my own boyfriend.



Then there were the adults ... new acquaintances I would meet here and there, staring at me for a few minutes, then timidly saying ... "You know who you look like ...?" The first time I heard it, I said, "Oh yeah, 'Spiderman's Girlfriend' ... I've heard it many times before." To which was the reply, "Oh no, she's all cracked out now, and your mouth is totally different. You are a RINGER for Amy Adams, though!"

And then came my kids at school. At first, it was comments about old-school Kirsten Dunst (the aforementioned "Spiderman's Girlfriend reference) ... which sparked a HUGE debate ... then it was, "No, no, no! She looks like that Amy Adams lady." The kids stared, had me turn many different angles, look her up on the Internet ... then they all agreed with amazement ... "Yeah, you do look like her!"



I didn't really see Kirsten Dunst back then, and I don't really see Amy Adams now. I mean, my hair is definitely naturally a distinctive shade of light reddish brown these days (and more red the older I get) a lot like hers, but ... still.

As I said, I am CERTAINLY NOT AT ALL bothered by the compliments! I've always thought she was a lovely girl (well before the comments began), and I am actually flattered that so many others think I resemble her so closely. I just can't, myself, see it so distinctively.



Anyway, isn't that odd?! I very much think so ...