'Rockin' in the free world ...'

Okay, friends and readers, I need some help! You know how I mentioned in my profile that I can't seem to find any "new" music that I like/enjoy too much? (Maybe you didn't read that part, but it's what I said.)

Well ... it is the sad, sad truth. I have certainly been in a musical rut for a while now and need some major assistance. Suggestions, please?! Respond anonymously if you feel shy, and don't be nervous about the advice being a flop. As long as it doesn't suck, I can appreciate any kind of music. ;)

The reason for urgency is that I've been doing a lot of cleaning/rearranging/organizing in my apartment/room (efficiency is key) and music is my only savior during those times of locking myself away. Basically, I've grown tired of being tired of what I listen to over and over and over, ad nauseam.

Now I beg ... please give me suggestions! I'm sure I'm out of the loop somewhere. Educate me!

That's all for right this second. I'll have more on the goings-on (interviews, outcomes, new developments, and so on) either later today, in the middle of the night, or tomorrow morning. For now, it's the top o' the closet. Hoo-ah!

Blotch

Today I was forced to attend a seminar. Actually, 'forced' is a strong word. I 'had' to go, against my base desires and will to remain coherent throughout the middle of the day. It was the final mandatory day for my certification: Assessments 1 & 2. It's not that the presenter was bad; he was really good, in fact. It also wasn't that the information was poor; it was very insightful. It's more that I simply did not want to sit in a room full of over-opinionated people for 8 hours.

The highlight was when I was called on to come to the front of the conference room and discuss a topic the presenter thought I knew a lot about (fooled him!), only to realize 3 hours later (after the seminar was over) that I had black ink all over the tip of my nose. The tricky thing about it is that I love, and I do mean L-O-V-E these certain ballpoint pens ... but they ooze. And by 'ooze,' I mean EXPLODE (slight exaggeration) all over my hands when I write anything more than a single check with them. So, the pen sprung a leak on my hand, and I'm sure I rubbed my nose (frequently with allergies here in the summer), which then implanted said ink on said nose. Lovely.

This brings up something that has always perplexed me: the phenomenon that no one tells you when something is on your face. The same applies to whales in the sea (hangers in the nostril region) and junk in the grill (food in the teeth). I mean, what's so bad about just telling someone? Do they think it would be more embarrassing to bring it to your attention than to let you sit in front of them like a total fool, basking in your unruliness? I digress ...

Ah, Hurricane Edwardo (right?) was supposed to hit the Austin area this afternoon, but never did. I am a little saddened by this. It's not that I wanted a monsoon or anything, but some rain might have been nice. It did open up a little and give us a taste on my drive home around 4. That was nice and the smell was delicious ... like clean, fresh, wet dirt. I think that is what I've decided rain smells like. Maybe the reason I am so enamored by it flashes back to my days of being a very little girl and frolicking about in my grandparents' yard, digging for roly-polies to put in one of my grandmother's Mason Jars (holes poked in the top and grass in the bottom, of course).

The only other morsel of information I have to share today is that I pre-ordered J.K. Rowling's new book, which comes out in early December, on Amazon the other day. I have absolutely NO CLUE what it is about, but I have to say ... I'll gladly purchase anything that woman puts out. Nothing will EVER be like HP, but that's okay. I'm *still* holding out for the promised encyclopedia, only because I'm a total loser/nerd like that. What can you do?

'It's a wild hope ..."

I just got back from an interview with a magnet school here. Basically, this school is the best of the best when it comes to academics in the area. The kids are (literally) geniuses.

Other than that, I don't want to say too much else about it because I really have no clue which way the pendulum will swing. All I am at liberty to say for now (because my nerves are too crazy for more) is that I will know one way or the other by Friday morning. They told me the decision will be a quick one as new teacher orientation starts on Monday, August 11th.

With that in mind, everyone (please!) send some good thoughts my way, and I'll give an update by Friday evening. In the meantime, I am going to do my best to harness my chi, relax, not dwell, and say my affirma ... well, no ... I'll just do my best to stay calm.

Fingers AND toes, friends! Thank you, kindly.

The Heat Is On

The heat here is unbearable. You say you are going to do so many cool, neat, fun things in the summer ... but it's all a lie. You don't realize it at the time of speaking, but a lie, it most certainly is. All you can do is sit around in your (poorly-cooled, air-conditioner-overtime-working) apartment, and hope you don't roast between the hours of 10am and 8pm.

It doesn't cool off here at night like it does where I am from. It's amazing what you take for granted, like a nice night in the summer when sitting on the back porch doesn't entail two changes of shirts and a long, cold shower before bed.

What I'm trying to get at is that it is absolutely miserable outside. The humidity isn't even that bad ... there's been no rain. It's triple-digits day after day after day with no foreseeable reprieve in sight. So, the discussions of jetskis and river floats and museum-going-Saturdays and even drinks on the patio are shot.

It's all you can do to avoid the lovely "rolling blackouts" the news warns of, and keep enough sunscreen lathered when running errands to not get burned. (No exaggeration necessary.) I don't care what anybody says, I'm living in the tropics.

And I'm not a tropical girl. For now, I can make it through. I can drink my ice-cold water and wear shorts boasting my lily-white legs. I can even put on my two-piece and take a dip in the well-kept pool, ever-reminded that the UV here is different than anything I've ever experienced. Everything is harsher, everything is boiling.

At least we live in a time where electricity runs freely and we can rape the world of all natural resources in our attempts to be as pampered as possible. (Please note the extreme sarcasm.)

One thing is certain: my body was not made to brave these stifling days and nights of hot-hot-heat. I was made for all four seasons, not one, long season spanning without end. And at least if one is going to be this petulant, let it be winter, when the cold can be broken by layers and the snow makes me feel like a little girl.

Pen it down.

I don't know where I'll end up living when it's all said and done, but I know it will have to be somewhere with all four seasons ... somewhere that snows.

Analyze this!

It's Shark Week on The Discovery Channel. I have always been fairly fascinated by sharks (probably because they scare the buh-jeez out of me), so this week is one typically one with lots of TV for me. Instead of having to lock myself away and watch alone, I have a partner in nerdy-ness this year. The Boy has DVRed all of the interesting things and we have been watching them in the evenings (in between Tennis on Wii and Californication Season 1 on DVD).

Anyway, two days ago we were watching this one show about a guy attempting to put sharks in South Africa in a catatonic state, nicknamed "Tonic" by touching them with his hand. Essentially what the guy does (which is INSANE!) is get in the water with the Great White Sharks, and as they come towards him head-on, he touches their noses. Something about the hand-to-nose contact releases a ton of serotonin in the sharks' brains and puts them in this completely calm and dazed state where they don't move (and even sink sometimes). I only explain this because it applies to this ...

(Well, that, and now you all share my knowledge on how to avert a shark attack in open water ... just reach out and touch its nose, silly! Pffffft!)

Something about watching that right before bed made me have this really crazy dream where we had a house with a pond in the backyard. We also had a huge alligator as a pet living in that pond that would curl up in a ball (like a cat or dog) and sleep against the back door. In the dream, though, the way we would "pet" the alligator is to have it charge us and then touch its snout right before it chomped, which would put it in a catatonic state. Then we would roll it over and scratch its belly ... again, like a cat or dog.

I'm not sure why I thought up an alligator. I can suss out the rest fairly easily. We saw not only one, but two totally adorable dogs yesterday that I wouldn't mind owning. The first was on Californication (truly hilarious show), and I think it was a Boxer ... only it was bigger and tan. The other was a baby Corgi that looked like an Ewok with a tuxedo on its back and booties on its feet. They were both completely precious and I have Puppy Fever right now, so that explains the whole pet theme. The house thing is also easy to figure out, as we have been discussing "a house or an apartment?" and all of that good stuff. The alligator, though ... that one is completely lost on me.

Where's that crazy bastard, Freud, when you need him? ;)

'The world spins madly on ...'

Alright, alright, alright! I guess it's time to get this going. I've been sitting on this thing for quite a while, and have honestly thought about writing something on here just about every day for the past few months. Why I haven't, I'm not sure. I could lie and say it's because I am way too busy to sit down and crank out a few lines, but that would be a lie of monstrous proportions.

I have not been too busy, and I have not been without things to say. I've just been ... distracted, I guess. It's not laziness and it's not even procrastination. It's just that I find myself getting lost in my own thoughts for periods of time long enough to lapse hours, or I find myself packing for yet another adventure with Alex, or I have applications to fill out and resume packets to send, or reading to do, or a phone call to make, or an email to check. You see the circle.

But not now! I really should use this, if for nothing else, than to just take a few minutes a day to think privately and write something down to mark (it sounds cheesy) life. Plus, the added bonus is that it keeps my typing skills at their tippity-top shape. No school and no legitimate work for the time being has made my ninja typing speed a little more rusty than normal. No worries, though. It's just like riding a bike. Jump on and pedal, baby ... just jump on and pedal.

So, maybe I could move onto something a little more relevant? Like, what's going on these days, perhaps? Sure ... why not?

To begin, I am now fully certified to teach English Grades 8-12. This coming Saturday (the 2nd of August), I will take another test to become certified for Grades 4-8 as well. I never thought I would want to work with kids younger than 15, but desperate times call for desperate measures. And, trust me, desperate times these are! Why, you ask? Well, it is to do with AISD putting a bit of a hiring freeze on all secondary teachers who are not either Special Ed or Bilingual. The trouble here is that I am neither of those, so the freeze certainly applies to me. It's extremely frustrating for me because we all hear about how schools are in such dire need of teachers, yet when I actually get completely certified, I am told I can't teach where I currently live ... right now, anyway. From what I am hearing, though, the freeze isn't going to thaw for quite some time 'round these parts. I think the big problem is funding. There is a cap of 22 students to 1 teacher for Elementary, but Middle and High School have no government-mandated cap. Right now, in this area, the ratio of student to teacher in High School (and I think Middle School as well) is about 36:1. It's ridiculous!

So, as you can imagine, I've been feeling the great frustrations of "The Real World" (not the MTV show, mind you) for the past couple of months. I sent out close to 40 application packets (with a ton of supplemental "HIRE ME!" things) to every school within a 40 mile radius of Austin, which have all been left unanswered. Oh, wait, I did receive one response from a local principal saying he was extremely impressed with my packet, but was not doing any hiring for the Fall. If that changed, apparently I'm first on his list to call. Fat lot of good that's going to do me! Because, as I said earlier, it is not likely to change for a while to come.

I think the final nail in the coffin of my high aspirations with AISD happened a little over a week ago when I was finally able to contact someone in the district by phone and was informed of the No-Hire-Rule so far for 08-09. (This applies to ALL teachers applying for AISD, not just first-years like myself.) Due to all of this mess down here, I'm having to consider other options elsewhere in Texas. (More on that if anything comes to fruition ...)

The short part of the long version up above is that I really want and need a teaching job IMMEDIATELY. I will do something else if I absolutely have to, but I would prefer to just find a position in that which I have been trained and certified. It just seems like an awful lot of work gone to waste if nothing comes about in the near future. Of course, no matter what, I'll make the most of anything that happens. Aside from a few really bad days last week, I'm not letting any of this get me too far down. For now, I'm just keeping my fingers crossed for a nibble on the job line somewhere else. That would mean moving AGAIN, but that's okay. As Alex says, "I'm adventurous!" I'll just adhere to his statement and do whatever needs to be done.

The good news is that, not only do I have a great family cheering me on, but I also have a very supportive and amazing man by my side at all times. I'm not saying that the somewhat recent discussions of "What if ..." and "But, how ..." and "Hypothetically speaking ..." have all been perfect and hunky-dory and smooth and super-duper-great. I'm just saying that the outcome of all of the discussions has been extremely positive and has eased a huge amount of stress. I would honestly be a lot more worried and upset about the repercussions of another move, but I don't have to be because Alex has actually said he will go with me if I get a job somewhere other than Austin. This, of course, is all that I could ever ask for. I mean, my life lessons have taught me that nothing is ever 100% certain, but still ... I trust this one with all of me. Besides, 'we' are a great 'we,' and 'we' definitely want to keep it that way ... which is nice.

I will say that being a "big girl" and making "big girl" decisions is a lot harder than I ever would have guessed. It's not that I can't handle it, or that I am freaking out in the least. It's more that I am at a point in my life where I am making my decisions while wholly factoring in another person in order to go on this journey (wherever it leads) completely together. It's not a burden and it's not an imposition and it's not a complaint ... AT ALL ... what it is, however, is a challenge. A good challenge, though. One that I welcome whole-heartedly, and one that I know will continue to be fulfilling and better than I ever thought it could be. (Sorry, I'm getting sappy. I'll stop.)

So, yeah, I guess that's the big thing. Me (and Alex, of course) trying to figure out what the heck to do in this transitional point of our lives. It's a little rough, as I said, but I truly believe that it will all work out eventually. It may not be exactly how I had planned ... moving here, getting an awesome job right away, staying for at least a while, knocking this city on its ass, so on and so forth ... but it WILL work out, somehow.

Okay, I think that's all I am going to write for now. I need to start packing for yet another trip out of town. (Alex and I sussed out the other day that we have been in town only 1 weekend in the past 6! Wow!) This trip is business-related, however, much unlike the others. As I said previously, I'll discuss more once I know what's what.

Later posts may also be back-tracking a bit, I believe. It's been a while since I have blogged consistently, so it might take some time to get back into the swing of things full- force. Or not. We shall see. I do need to write about our trip to New Mexico at the beginning of this month, going to see Jersey Boys in Dallas this past weekend, some family updates, some friend updates, my thoughts on the Wii (Alex's birthday present), Shark Week, and some other random miscellany that I'm sure will be thrilling to read about. (Ha!)

For now, I hope everyone is very well. I'm sure I'll be "talking" to you all soon.

Love, ballpoint pens, and snow cones!
- S.